Top 3 Parenting Books (with actual useful advice)
There is such a vast number of parenting books on the market. Time is so incredibly precious when you have a new baby, or generally with children, that you certainly want to choose your reading materials wisely. Reading a bad book is always painful. When you’ve only got ten minutes to spare before the baby wakes or before you fall asleep, how you’re spending your time matters even more.
As a parent and a perinatal educator, I have read a lot of books on pregnancy, birth and babies. I’m talking 100s and 100s, over the years. With all that time spent, I can tell you that the books that stood out had some similar qualities:
✔️ They are funny. They made me laugh out loud to myself in public and want to share the content with other parents.
✔️ They are non-judgemental and non-shaming. To me this is a key. No parent wants to spend their free time feeling judged. There is too much of that going around already.
✔️ They are realistic. So many books on pregnancy, birth, and parenting, set up scenarios that are highly unrealistic. This always boggles my mind, as the authors are often parents themselves (unicorn babies?). The truth is, we need to see ourselves within the pages of a parenting book, to feel normal and boost our confidence. Because it can feel so lonely, we need to feel that we aren’t alone and others are facing the same parenting struggles we are.
These books do all of the above and more. A is for Advice written by Ilana Stanger-Ross, runs through the alphabet, giving you sweet, funny, and useful advice for each letter. It’s also beautifully illustrated.
Here’s a snippet:
G is for Guilt
Be gentle with yourself.
We put a lot of pressure on ourselves: the perfect birth, the perfect baby, the perfect mother.
Know right now that you will not be perfect. You will say and do things you wish you hadn’t. More often, you will simply be too distracted or tired or overwhelmed to say or do what you’ll wish you would have.
…
Be gentle with yourself.
Model the compassion you have for your child by giving the compassion, also to yourself.
-Ilana Stanger-Ross, A is for Advice (The Reassuring Kind), p. 41-42
Dear Mother by Bunmi Laditan is pure laugh out loud joy. She takes the simplest parts of parenting and expresses them in bite sized hilarity.
time flies when you’re having fun
but when you’re putting
a three year old to bed
it mostly just laughs.
-Bunmi Laditan, Dear Mother, p. 48
But her words are also so moving. Like this:
If motherhood has taught me anything
it’s that beauty transcends scars
the ones that run like deep oceans
across my abdomen and things
it’s taught me true strength is soft
a gentle word spoken at 3 a.m.
as my blood boils
and body screams with fatigue
it’s taught me joy cannot be bought
but is found in dandelion fields
rain soaked parks
and unexpected kiss
and for those lessons
precious jewels
I am grateful
Bunmi Laditan, Dear Mother, p.205
The Secret Art of Being a Parent, written by Bridget Watson Payne, is a beautifully illustrated book with so many nuggets of wisdom. There’s funny tips on what to do with a dropped pacifier, a guide on how to pack a diaper bag and she’s even included some kid friendly jokes (you’ll need to up your joke making skills soon enough). There is also a lot in this book about being kind to yourself, your baby and other parents - essentially her apt running message is that there is no right way to be a baby or a parent. Due to copyright, I cannot give you a snippet. But here is a link that shows you a couple pictures from the book.
Get them from the shop, the library or put them on your registry. These are 3 books you’ll want to have around, to support you on your parenting journey.
Happy Reading - and Parenting!
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